Soooo @PaiWingfeather (✨Unaligned✨, BLC, AMLC, Oreo Warrior) mentioned an incorrect quotes generator she used to make her incorrect quotes. I found one online and used a bunch of its quotes, hope you all enjoy!
Gammon: I’m having a baby!!
Maraly: that’s great!!
Gammon, slamming adoption papers down: it’s you, sign here.
Janner, driving Kalmar and Leeli: So how was your day?
Kalmar: We almost got surprise adopted!
Janner: What?
Leeli: We almost got kidnapped.
Janner: Oh, okay.
Janner: slams on the breaks WAIT WHAT?!
Leeli, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him
Janner: You did WHAT–
Kalmar: William Snakepeare
Janner: While I’m gone, Kalmar, you’re in charge.
Kalmar: Yes!!!
Janner, whispering: Leeli, you’re secretly in charge.
Leeli: Obviously.
Janner: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Kalmar?
Kalmar: … No.
Leeli: I do!
Janner: I know, Leeli.
Leeli: I’m happy!
Janner: I know, Leeli.
Janner: We need a distraction.
Leeli: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?
Kalmar, whispering: My time has come
Jannner: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends.
Kalmar: ... Your what?
Jannner: My friends.
Leeli: Is he saying “friends”?
Maraly: I think he’s being sarcastic.
Sara: No, no, no, this is delirium, he’s cracked from being awake all night.
Sara: What did you guys get in your yearbook?
Kalmar: 'Prettiest Smile'
Leeli: 'Nicest Personality'
Maraly: 'Most likely to start a fight'
Janner: 'Least likely to start a fight, but most likely to win one'
Kalmar: I’ve done a lot of dumb stuff.
Leeli: I witnessed the dumb stuff.
Maraly: I joined in on the dumb stuff.
Janner: I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF!!!
Sara: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?
Kalmar: Several traffic violations.
Leeli: Three counts of resisting arrest.
Maraly: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.
Janner: Also, that’s not our car.
Kalmar: I’m an idiot.
Janner:
Leeli:
Maraly:
Sara:
Kalmar:
Maraly: If you’re waiting for us to disagree, this is going to be a long day.
Leeli: Good responses for being stabbed with a knife?
Kalmar: Rude.
Janner: That’s fair.
Maraly: Not again.
Sara: Are you going to want this back?
Janner: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Kalmar will and will not eat.
Leeli: Grass? Yes!
Janner: Moss? Yes!!
Leeli: Leaves? Ohh, yes!
Janner: Shoelaces? Strange but true!
Leeli: Worms? Sometimes!
Janner: Rocks? Usually nah.
Leeli: Twigs? Usually!
Janner: Maraly's cooking? Inconclusive!
Maraly: How did you… test this?
Janner: You just hand him stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if he eats it, he eats it.
Maraly: ... I don’t know how to feel about this.
Sara: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?
Janner, trying to convince Maraly to join the group: You know... I thought it'd be good to have someone come along who's really... strong!
Leeli: And grumpy!
Kalmar: And oblivious to reality!
Maraly:
Kalmar: Nothing in life is free.
Leeli: Love is free!
Janner: Adventure is free.
Sara: Knowledge is free.
Maraly: Everything is free if you take it without paying.
Sara: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do?
Janner: Have everyone stand.
Leeli: Bring three more chairs!
Kalmar: The most important ones can sit down.
Maraly: leave.
Leeli: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life
Kalmar: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years!
Maraly: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this!
Janner: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!
Sara: My moral code, is that you?
Leeli:
Leeli: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk my mother left me but do you guys need a hug?
Everyone right before Janner's wedding
Kalmar: Well I have to go, I have a wedding to attend.
Leeli: Wait... Oh! I have a wedding to attend too!
Podo: Oh, I have a wedding to attend as well
Nia: I THINK WE ALL HAVE WEDDINGS TO ATTEND
Artham, panicked: I THINK I HAVE A WEDDING TO OFFICIATE
Kalmar: Rules are made to be broken.
Janner: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.
Leeli: Uh, piñatas.
Podo: Glow sticks.
Nia: Karate boards.
Artham: Spaghetti when you have a small pot.
Kalmar: Rules.
Janner:
Janner: Dumbest scar stories, go!
Kalmar: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.
Leeli: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it.
Podo: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade.
Nia: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn.
Artham:
Artham: I have emotional scars.
Janner: What do you think Kalmar will do for a distraction?
Leeli: he’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.
*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*
Leeli: ... or he could do that.
Leeli: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?
Janner: You’re a hazard to society
Kalmar: And a coward. DO TWENTY
Janner, to Kalmar: My life is in the hands of an idiot!
Kalmar, motioning to himself and Leeli: No no no no no, TWO idiots!
Janner: If you had to choose between Kalmar and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose?
Leeli: That depends, how much money are we taking about?
Kalmar: Leeli!
Janner: 63 cents.
Leeli: I'll take the money.
Kalmar: LEELI!!!
Janner, texting Kalmar: Kalmar! Help I’m being kidnapped
Kalmar: Where are you?
Janner: I’m with some strange person. In a car. Help.
Kalmar: I’ll call Leeli.
Leeli, answering their cell: Y’ello?
Kalmar: Where’s Janner? He texted me that he was being kidnapped.
Leeli: Janner? Whaddya mean, he’s right next to me-
Leeli:
Leeli: I’ll call you back. hangs up
Leeli: THE NEW HAIRCUT ISN’T THAT BAD!
Janner: WHO ARE YOU?!
Store Worker: Would a Mr. Janner please come to the front desk?
Janner, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?
Store Worker: points to Kalmar and Leeli
Store Worker: I believe they belong to you?
Kalmar and Leeli, simultaneously: We got lost
Janner: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me-
Janner: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container.
Kalmar: The cow???
Janner: What?
Leeli: Kalmar, W H Y?
Janner: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me.
Kalmar: We're the best thing that's ever happened to you?
Janner: Yes!
Leeli: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.
Janner and Kalmar sitting in jail together
Kalmar: So who should we call?
Janner: I’d call Nia, but I feel safer in jail
Janner: What if I press the brake and gas at the same time?
Kalmar: The car takes a screenshot.
Leeli: For the last time, get out.
Janner: You love me, right, Kalmar?
Kalmar: Normally, I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don’t like it.
Janner: Where are you going?
Kalmar: To get ice cream
Maraly: or commit a felony.
Kalmar: we’ll decide on the way there.
Janner: Maker, give me patience.
Kalmar: I think you mean 'give me strength'.
Janner: If the Maker gave me strength, you'd be gone.
Janner: Kalmar and I have the kind of sibling chemistry where we finish each other's-
Kalmar: Sentences.
Janner: Don't interrupt me.
Janner: Violence isn't the answer.
Kalmar: You’re right.
Janner: sighs in relief
Kalmar: Violence is the question.
Janner: What?
Kalmar, bolting away: And the answer is yes.
Janner, running after them: NO-
Janner: What if the 'g' in 'gif' is silent?
Kalmar: Go to sleep
Janner: What gif I don't want to?
Kalmar: ugh
Janner: Walking in to a room
Sorry I’m late... I was... doing things.
Sounds of running footsteps progressively getting louder
Kalmar: Out of breath HE PUSHED ME DOWN THE STAIRS.
Janner: WHAT’S YOUR TYPE
Kalmar: Anything, honestly, but stranders especially
Janner, desperately, as Kalmar lays in the ambulance: YOUR BLOOD TYPE
Kalmar: Oh! B positive.
Janner: DONT TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE
Kalmar:
Janner: Ok, maybe playing ‘whose family is most dysfunctional’ wasn’t the best idea we’ve had. Maraly's been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can’t get her out...
Janner: So that’s my plan.
Kalmar: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don’t want to sound mean.
Janner: No, go ahead, I want to hear it.
Kalmar: It’s a terrible plan.
Janner: That’s not constructive criticism.
Janner: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.--
[translation: I’M SORRY]
Kalmar: What's that?
Janner: Remorse code.
Kalmar: I'm even angrier now.
Janner: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
Kalmar, drinking toast: Why do you say that?
Janner: I've already sent good vibes your way… they’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them.
Kalmar: This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.
Janner: I'm incredibly fast at math.
Kalmar: Alright, what's 30x17?
Janner: 47
Kalmar: That's not even close.
Janner: But it was fast.
Janner: It’s dark in here
Kalmar: Don’t worry dude I got this
Kalmar: Stomps his feet
Kalmar: Skechers light up
HAVE SOME MUNCHES:
🍔🍟🍕🥓🍿🧇🥞🍦🍪🍪🍪🍪🍫🧀🥖🥖
OHMYWORD I'VE BEEN LAUGHING FOR THE PAST TEN MINUETS THESE WERE HILARIOUS- THE KNIFE ONE GOT ME XXXD nOt AgAiN!!!! ...are you gonna want this back? ALSO IM SO USING THE GOOD VIBES ONE IRL JUST TO FREAK PEOPLE OUT-
Takes chocolate bar THOSE WERE QUALITY. MY FAVORITE WAS THE WEDDING ONE😂
Oh my word theses were HILARIOUS!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I liked the ‘finishing each others sentences’ one. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 And the blood type one was great 🤣🤣🤣🤣 and the one directly after made me incredibly sad for Maraly… BUT I STILL LOVED THESE!!!!!!!
Now I want to drink toast…
I've actually used these but I laughed IRL at ur usage