-are y'all okay with it being in 1st person or would you rather it still be 3rd like the books?
-Does it make sense for her to be telling them about Anniera?
“Janner!” I yelled as he took the journal from my hands, holding it over his head as if I couldn’t stand up and reach it.
He knew he couldn’t outrun me either; he failed too many times to make it a challenge. With a sigh, I held one hand out, palm up, and easily stole the journal back with the other. I traced lightly over the Annieran symbol I’d sketched in the corner. It wasn’t even close to the real one, but it was close enough.
“Aren’t you supposed to be working on something?” I asked. Nia– wait, no, don’t get into that habit again. Mama and Po–Grandpa had gone to town for the day and me, Janner, Ka-Tink, and Leeli were supposed to be working on our Annieran studies, THAGS(1).
“Yes,” He said. I tried to interrupt, but he started speed-talking so no words could be shared. “But you said you would help me. How exactly am I supposed to write a journal when nothing interesting happens to write about?”
“Write about Sara Cobbler!” Someone shouted. I picked up a Glipfruit and threw it carefully behind me to roll up the tree and . . . No. Don’t think about it. You’re needed now, not then. The fruit falls to the ground, splitting open and splashing the back of my leg with juice.
I hear Nugget start barking and head over, and I'm thankful for the interruption.
“Nuggs!” I call, reaching to unlock the garden gate. He rushes over and I open it just in time for him not to crash into it on his way to what I’d assume to be thwaps.
Closing the gate carefully behind me, I walk between the fresh shoots, watching closely for movement under the crop leaves.
“I didn’t know you could do that!” I jerk my head up, realizing the growl was coming from me, ready to act out of another creature’s thoughts.
“What?”
“I didn’t know you could do that,” Leeli said from beyond the fence.
“Do what?” I asked, begging she didn’t notice the other side.
“You changed your eye color. They’re usually green, but they were just closer to yellow.”
I shrug and smile, trying not to show the worry I’m sure is plain on my face, “I didn’t realize.”
I didn’t realize my vision had returned to normal either.I shake my head to clear it and whistle-click Nugget over as I head out to hopefully finish my writing.
“Are you okay with your songs or do you need help?” I ask.
“No, I’m just working on memorization right now.” Leeli responds.
I smile and pick the worn journal from the ground. Not the same as the carefully cut and bound leather of Anniera or the Green Hollows(2), but there’s definitely been worse.
I wonder if Mr. Reteep has any books about Papa and Uncle Esben. I doubt most of them are true.
“If we hurry up and finish, we may be able to borrow some books from Mr. Reteep later.” Janner and Tink stopped wrestling and climbed on different branches of the tree, suddenly determined to finish anything they might have to do.
“Maddie, can you tell us a story about Anniera?” Tink asked from his challenge to climb higher than Janner through his fear of heights.
I sit down against the tree, no longer trying to add anything to my journal.
“What kind of story?” I ask.
“Um, about the king?”
“Well, they say he used to work in the fields along with the farmers-”
“But he’s a king!”
“Yes, but Annierans believed that even though there is a king, it is more for order than to rule. That’s why-”
“Can we just go already?” Janner interrupts.
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1)THAGS, Three Great And Honored Subjects; word, form, and song. Some foolish people believe there should be a fourth Great and Honored Subject, but they are sadly mistaken
2)The Green Hollows is home to much fruit
Next Chapter!
Truly 'tis incedible. Methinks a first person narrative would suffice
😀
I think this is really good I can see there's a great story coming, can't wait! I also really like it in 1st person
Ooh, that's good! I guess this means Tink is a singer?????