In the Midst of the Lonely Sea of Loneliness 20

She couldn't look at it any longer. The drawing from her past was so beautiful and warm that Neet couldn't look at it any more. Why should she enjoy such beauty in the art of her husband's hand when she was not worthy? To behold a King's work with guilty hands... Neet did not feel she deserved that kind of joy after what she had done.

"On... Esolc eht koob." Neet anxiously reached over and attempted to such the sketchbook on the drawing. "I t'nac kool ta ti."

"Nia? What is it, dear?" Wendolyn asked, pulling the book away so it would not be closed. "Nia, don't you recognize yourself?"

Just when she had thought she had relief from the ringing, the sound of her name shot like an arrow into her eardrums, causing not only physical pain but also mental anguish. Neet recoiled her body from her mother and tightly held her claws over her ears, the ringing getting louder.

"Nia...?" Wendolyn gently rested her hand on her daughter's knee when she saw her balling up. "Honey, you must tell me what's the matter."

"Esolc eht koob!" Neet suddenly roared and trembled. "Esolc ti! Esolc ti!"

Poor Wendolyn did not understand why her daughter was screaming and if she spoke the truth, her daughter was beginning to scare her. Thankfully, it would take more than fear to stop a mother from helping her child.

Wendolyn got up and knelt down in front of Neet to get a look at her eyes. "Nia! What's the matter? You seemed so happy to bring this book home and now you're upset just looking at its contents! What about a drawing of you and your eldest son has you so riled?"

Neet recoiled at the sound of her name and Wendolyn caught a look in her daughter's eyes she remembered well. It was the same wild look Nia held when she was about to run.

"Oh no, you don't!" Wendolyn grabbed hold of both of her daughter's hand and held them down away from her face. "You aren't leaving again!"

With surprising strength, Neet was able to rip her claws away from her mother and spring into the air. She landed on all fours a couple feet from the couch and she made a run for the front door.

Before Wendolyn could even scream for Podo or Artham, Podo made his appearance in the doorway.

He had just returned from the garden after disposing of the thwaps when he was nearly run over by his daughter, who was not thinking rationally due to her guilt.

The sight of her father made Neet quickly halt and change direction. She began to run to the back door, where Artham and the children were sitting.

"NIA!" Podo bellowed and began hobbling after her as fast as he could. "ARTHAM! Back door!"

Artham was hardly given even a second to spring into action but thank the Maker, he did just in time. From the call to the moment Neet burst through the back door, he swiftly tackled her to the ground without hesitation.

Neet roared again, struggling to get up with Artham trying to detain her. She was frantic- no- she was wild. The sounds she was making did not sound like a human, not even close.

The poor Igiby children backed away from the scene, watching as their Uncle desperately tried to stop their mother from fleeing their home. They all were in complete disbelief and terror to see this happen in front of them.

"Nia! Stop!" Artham cried as he held her fast in an embrace. "Stop! We aren't losing you again! Not while there's breath in my lungs!"

Neet made a hissing noise and tried to push him off but just as surprising it was to her, Artham wasn't letting go no matter how much of her strength she used against him. However, she never once used her claws on him, demonstrating the real Nia was still in there.

Podo quickly hobbled out of the house and joined Artham in his mission to bring Nia back from her Neet state of mind.

Wendolyn joined the children as Podo helped Artham restrain her.

"What's happening to, Mama?!" Leeli cried, hiding her face in Wendolyn's side.

Wendolyn had no answer for her granddaughter, staring at the scene before her with expectation. She prayed in her heart to the Maker to help her daughter see the light.

The tussle went on for several minutes before Neet finally gave up fighting, leaving herself and her two relatives exhausted. She was reduced to tears, which was nothing new to the rest of the family.

"Nia... Lily... Wingfeather. What in Aerwiar has gotten into ye, lass?" Podo asked out of breath, Neet now tightly in his arms.

Neet began to struggle at the sound of her name, the ringing in her ears starting up once more.

"Podo, you... you can't call her by her name when she's... like this..." Artham panted as he gave a firm reminder about the original arrangements with Nia's name. "We have to... call her Neet if we don't want her... to run."

"That's not me daughter's name!" Podo shouted in response before quieting himself down. "Her name is Nia Wingfeather and that's all she will be- even if she runs to the ends of the world! She would still be Nia Wingfeather and I will not be calling her 'Neet' anymore!"

With each mention of her name, Neet recoiled and fought her father to let her go but quickly found out she would not be going anywhere so all she could do was scream and cry.

Podo held Nia close and rocked her back and forth. "Shhh... Ye are Nia Wingfeather... Ye can't run from that, waterlily. Ye are Nia, mother of Janner, Tink, and Leeli. Ye are Nia, daughter of Podo and Wendolyn. Ye are Nia, Queen of Anniera and you will not be running away from that.

"I don't... I don't deserve to... be called that anymore..." Nia whimpered as she finally gave up and rested her head on her father's chest. "I'm not... I'm broken, Papa... I left Esben when... he needed me the most..."

"Shhh." Podo replied while he stroked her head, paying no mind she was speaking correctly. "Ye are Nia, even if ye don't deserve to be called Nia. I don't care what ye did. I and yer Ma named ya and the Maker knows that ain't changin'." He pulled her face away to look into her eyes. "I might not know all that happened to ye but I'm not letting ye just up and run out like you've been doin'. Yer kids don't deserve that and neither do you."

"I-I'm sorry, Papa..." Nia continued to whimper and sob. "I'm so... so sorry..."

"And I've already forgiven ye." Podo pulled her back into the hug and continued rocking her back and forth.

Despite her father's words of forgiveness, Nia kept repeating how she sorry she was over and over with nearly no breath in-between.

As for the others, the watched on, all shocked to be hearing Nia speak perfectly, aside from her shaky breathing. Everyone began to have hope that perhaps they would be able go communicate more clearly with Nia after all this was said and done.

Tink leaned closer to Janner and asked in a whisper, "What just happened to mom?"

"I-I don't know... But I think this is a good thing?" Janner whispered back, unsure of how he should act in this situation.

Silence filled the air for a moment more before Leeli walked over to her grandpa and mother.

"Mama... I... I want to play you a song. Would you like that?" Leeli asked, hoping she might provide some comfort to her mother. "I was just practicing it for Uncle Artham and... I didn't finish it. I think I need to finish it for you."

Nia looked over at her daughter from where she was in Podo's arms. She said nothing but instead, gave a subtle nod in approval of Leeli's request.

And with her mother's permission, Leeli began to sing the tune rather than play it on her whistleharp:

"Day pass, Night come,

Day present, Day one.

Joy pass, sorrow come,

Joy present, Joy won.

Pain in the heart like an arrow to the chest,

Always seeking for more but never finding rest,

Heart rest easy, find what's best.

Speak the true words, no matter how heavy.

Day pass, Night come,

Day present, Day one.

Joy pass, Sorrow come,

Joy present, Joy won.

Bring light, come day

Bring night, don't delay

For what is joy without sorrow but callous?

For what is sorrow without joy, so meaningless?

Made to grow in pain or sun,

It will not stop till the race is run,

Cry the tears and wash your face,

For your sorrow is not a disgrace.

Day pass, Night come,

Day present, Day one.

Joy pass, Sorrow come,

Joy present, Joy won.

The Maker allows rain and shine on all,

So let's make it to the finish line, even if by means we crawl."